AMPUTHEATRE returns!!!

Hey. Remember when I did this? Host a meet of The World's Goriest Board Game? Well, I'm doing it again. AMPUTHEATRE, this Friday (November 21st) at the Village Gate Plaza in front of Comics Etc. with a start time of 7 pm.

This is a new version of the game with a refined combat engine, so let's see how well it works.

Sound off if you're in!

Johnny Dangerously

AMPUTHEATRE Update. What? An update?

...I know.

It's been far too long since there's been an update, let alone a game. I've been working fairly militantly on Chenille Macabre stuff, since that's the thing that's currently making money. Nothing to live off, but nothing to sneeze at either.

But what I have done is made an all-new revision of AMPUTHEATRE. It's version 10.0 (I lost count a while ago) and it fixes a lot of the ambiguities of the first game. Hopefully, there's nothing here that needs more than two sentences to explain.

New rules first:
  • The terms Strength, Dexterity and Arcana are all gone. Counter, Dodge and Resist are all we need.
  • All Slashers now have an Escape score. None of this Use an Attack that doesn't need arms stuff. Two hits are all you need.
  • All Slashers now have a basic Steal Attack. It has a generic 0-1 range and deals no Carnage. Instead, it takes one item (Weapon, Spell, Sundered Limb) from your target.
  • Some Slashers now have Evil Deeds called Desperate Measures. These are black with either red or yellow text and are used when your Slasher becomes Wounded (yellow health) or Meat (red health). (This was Gramatan's idea.)
  • Rejecting Limbs: Slashers possessing an arm of another Slasher type (Human, Monstrous, Soulless or Unholy) must roll a die to retain that arm come the Suffering Phase.
Changes to Combat:
  • Stray Hits. Rolling a 5 when attacking a Slasher occupying a space with another hits the other Slasher for a touch of Carnage. (This was Jror_Tholin's idea.)
  • Guard Breaks/Parries. Whenever a Block is rolled, whoever rolled the more damaging hit (whether Attacker or Defender) may declare an Onslaught to Attack that Slasher. It's a Guard Break on offense, and a Parry on defense. (This was inspired by Heartless Rose who once wished that every day in AMPUTHEATRE could be Casual Friday.)
  • Slashers automatically Rise immediately after they are Attacked while Fallen, but only on their space (which keeps the strategy of Slashers Rising on their own.)
The following Slashers have been updated for the new rules. New rules worth mentioning will be done so here:
  • Ashezz.
  • Crossface has returned. His Twisted Gospel now lets its victims Move and Attack during their Free Actions to get them back in the game quicker. His Homophobia Desperate Measure protects him from Male Slashers trying to Hold or Throw him. Most devious of all is Crossface's Steal Attack, which must be Resisted.
  • Crucifiend has had his notorious Crucifrenzy converted to a Desperate Measure. If you do get the chance to use it though, it will knock people back much farther than it ever did. His Seppukku Backhand has been also toned down in both accuracy and range. To compensate, Crucifiend gets a new Evil Deed- his Corpse Breath which will Poison all Slashers in its path. If there's one thing Crucifiend should appreciate, it's damage protection.
  • General Ghebembwe.
  • Gnash.
  • Gutwrench.
  • Hazmat because you all love her so. This time her classic Dead Pool Evil Deed is a Desperate Measure.
  • He Who Wilts. The Carrion Crows Evil Deed has been revised and made a little bit easier to use.
  • Jack of Clubs. The Bad Shuffle Evil Deed is now a Desperate Measure, and he can be killed by performing a successful Steal Attack upon him while he is at 0 Pints.
  • Jinglebunny got a fair amount of surgery. The Bump N' Go Sawbones no longer runs randomly about the board, it's either a projectile or a Floor Trap. The Theme Song is more diabolical than ever- it forces its victim to spend an Onslaught to safely Move towards Jinglebunny. This is evil. On top of that, JInglebunny now has a Desperate Measure called the Bubble Bath, which is a Blinding Teleport. Beware.
  • Loggerhead has always been a little too tough for my tastes. The conversion of his Makeshift Club and Shrike Spearman into Desperate Measures brings him down to a more even keel.
  • Malice has had her stamina tweaked to make her a little bit more rough-and-tumble than she already was.
  • Mandibula can now save herself from Throws as a Desperate Measure.
  • Mr. Eyeball Plucker had his Stopwatch become a Desperate Measure- the fact that its Range has been reduced prevents it from becoming invincibly obnoxious. The Tweezer Summon can now hit a limit of three Slashers on its return to Mr. Plucker, which should cut down on any Line-Of Sight arguments. And generate a whole lot of new ones.
  • Nine Lives.
  • Scounch One-Ear.
  • The Thicket. The Thicket's powers regarding his barbed-wire armor has been handled with a great deal more clarity.
  • Trigger Treat. That whole Desert Eagle-cuffed-to-the-wrist crap is out the window. Even the Evil Wardens realized that giving a Slasher a .50 caliber handgun with laser sight might be a bad idea, so they confiscated it. Thus, Treat had to cobble for himself a Zip Gun. He still has his regular powers with it- it was more of a case of explaining why the range of the gun should be low, and why other Slashers shouldn't be able to fire it (only Treat knows how his custom gun works.)
  • Willy Mammoth. The Foreign Object is now a Desperate Measure, and Mammoth can even use it to get Spells. There you go.
  • Zuhochtlotl. Toned down a touch. The Goal Kick has been split into two Evil Deeds: regular and Running Goal Kick, which drops a touch of accuracy and Range for the power of shooting while moving.
And finally: two new Slashers!

Ixnay. A cock-up at the Witness Protection Program turned this tailor into a farmer into a serial killer with a stapled-shut mouth, human tongues around his neck, and thimbles fitted with utility blades. Ixnay is all about silence: he can move before other Slashers have a chance to act, and he can even strike a Slasher from the direction of another to disorient his victim and confuse them into retaliating against the wrong man. His Thumbnailer Impale forces his victim to make a Random Move the second they break free of it.

Lord Morax. By stringing his guitar with the innards of unbaptized children, this death metal musician could recite the passages of the Arcanuum Ex Mysteriius Spell Book into critically acclaimed music. Morax was a demon with the body of a bull and the head of a man; this guy fits that description. His most interesting power is that of retaining Spells after he has cast them, so long as they succeed, and so long as he has his Guitar. His Mosh Pit attack is an amusing AOE which will spread chaos in any mass donnybrook.

Finally, I'm seeking a new venue for AMPUTHEATRE. Nothing against Millennium- it's just far away from my apartment and gas isn't as cheap as it once was. I'm talking with some folks right now, and I'll let you know when the next game is.

For now, hang tight- and if you'll be at the ZombieFest 2008 in Monroeville PA, that's where the next demo will be!

Now: back to building.

  • Current Music
    Steve Parsons- Howling II Theme (Splatter Mix)
Chenille Macabre

New at Chenille Macabre: Stabbity Ann!

New in the Etsy store, it's Stabbity Ann! A red-headed librarian who for some unknown reason has taken to painting her face, punking herself out, and stalking the night to stab men to death. She wears barbed wire bracers and a windowscreen shirt. Her knives fit in both her hands and her calf sheaths. Take her home!

...In other news, I see that my deviantART page passed 2,000 views. Very cool indeed.
  • Current Music
    My Dying Bride- For You

More AMPUTHEATRE madness

...I think I'm gonna do some AMPUTHEATRE this Friday (May 30) at Millennium Games, starting around 7:15 or thereabouts. I'll reintroduce a classic Slasher or two while I'm at it.

Sound off if you're in, kids. 
  • Current Music
    van Canto- The Mission

It's been a while (x-post) I thought I had better hold a game of AMPUTHEATRE this Friday (May 16) at Millennium Games, starting at 7:15 or thereabouts.

No. I haven't posted in a while. Neither here or on my regular LJ. Answers will befallest thou come the dawn.

In the meantime, sound off if you're in.
  • Current Music
    Some irritating nonsense from Supertramp
Chenille Macabre


I took a small break from uploading monsters to my Etsy page, what with the game conventions (and don't forget, I'll be at UBCon this Saturday and Sunday with AMPUTHEATRE once again.)

But I still managed to squeak out a figure of the Nuckelavee. The Drow have nothing on this Scottish elf...

Standing 7" (17.78 cm) high and measuring 8" (20.32 cm) long, this skinless, foul centaurian stares down all that is pure with his single flaming eye. I gave him an autopsy because I didn't think he looked frightening enough.

More photos of the Nuckelavee are over at his Etsy page.
  • Current Music
    Some of the wicked score from Night Watch (in my head)

More SimCon 2008 photos

These photos are courtesy Evil Warden Moad Terran HQ:

"STOP it. There is NO "Pumpkin Man"! If you DON'T behave, you won't be allowed to play with your club for a WEEK...!"

As some of you may know, Y'Shakaa is one of AMPUTHEATRE's most diabolical villains: an evil, inhuman sorceror and leader of the Lemurian Warrior Caste... possessed of immense cryomantic powers... driven by genocidal intent... commander of a terrifying legion of demons and monsters... unafraid to challenge the Evil Wardens for eternal dominance of the earth. Here he is hitting himself in the head with a hammer.


In the background, Gnash readies the Gunsaw to decapitate the winner of Crucifiend vs. Riptease, who currently feels a humid, fetid wind on the back of the neck...

Finally, Moad and I were surprised to see a SimCon staffer gingerly stride over to the barren Mt. Ripper board with a figure of Donkey Kong in his hand. He placed Kong on the mountain and readied his digital camera. I laughed so hard that No, FUCK that noise came out of my nose. Let Jinglebunny and Crucifiend demonstrate what happens to anyone STUPID enough to enter the AMPUTHEATRE... 

Yes, it kind of does look like Crucifiend is doing something extremely unwholesome to poor DK. I submit that Cruiser (that's Kalessindb's nickname for him) has very long legs, and if you study the photo closely you'll see his belt is waaaay higher than Kong's butt. 

Then again, maybe Crucifiend does want to do him. I wouldn't put it past him.

On third thought, Crucifiend is blind. Maybe the other Slashers told him it was Kate Moss in a fur coat or something... it was April Fool's Day just recently. Maybe the other Slashers would really appreciate it if nobody told Crucifiend what he did- or about the photographs- since Cruiser really doesn't need any help in being pissed off.

You know... the more I think about this, the less happy I get. Hey, did I mention I'll be at UBCon at the University of Buffalo on April 12-13? No? Well, I will be! See you there!
  • Current Music
    Sirenia- The Other Side